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I'm a 32 year old mother of 2 fantastic little boys, ages 5 and 10. I'm a retail lackey who dreams of running away to San Francisco where I'll live on my trust fund and take photographs of the city all day.

Currently Reading

  • Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides

Movies You Should Check Out

  • Little Miss Sunshine
  • The Good Shepherd

Rocking My iPod This Week

  • Eminem
  • Hinder
  • The Fray

Categorically Speaking...

Thursday, March 30, 2006

My New Business Card




Jennifer Beals


~ will teach you to ~

Use your powers for evil


'What will your business card say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Just Who DO I Think I Am?

Today while debating in my class, my "opponent's" big death knell closing to my remarks was, "Well, just who do you think you are?" Great rebuttal, right? It actually got me thinking, though. Who exactly am I anyways? I post all these Blogthings and other little quizzes with info about me, but who am I underneath all the superficial? I don't exactly fit a cookie cutter definition of anything. I'm going to try, though, to lay myself out there on the pyre of self-examination and see what comes out of the smoke.

I'm a Cancer.

I may forget, but I will never forgive.

I am loyal to a fault.

I will fight anyone who threatens me - or my friends.

I have never once in nearly 26 years looked into the mirror and found someone other than a fat, ugly girl who doesn't quite fit in.

I can count many friends, but can fit the friends that I would give my life for (and theirs for me) on one solitary finger.

I could care less what other people think of me, yet I am panifully self-conscious.

I am completely ADD, but I am infinitely patient.

If I love you, I love you with all my being.

If I hate you, you will probably want to check into the witness protection program.

I find solace behind a camera lens.

I can debate U.S. foreign policy and the contribution of the hair band in American music history with equal intelligence and passion.

I am hypocritical.

If I say that I am fine, chances are pretty good that I am not.

I measure my happiness through the happiness of others.

My best friend is the only person in the whole world that totally gets me, and he is my compass.

Silence scares me, yet I can sit with Tyson, neither of us saying a word and feel okay.

There are only two people in the world that understand the profound meaning of the statement, "I need a flare gun...and some flares."

I can rock out to Marilyn Manson or the Backstreet Boys with equal excitement.

I love school, but can't stay motivated to go.

I feel stifled in my self-expression by society's definition of "acceptable".

I have no regrets, but often wonder "What if...?"

The hardest decision I have ever made was to betray my best friend to save his life and knowing, fearing he might hate me for it.

I would make that same decision 1,000 times over because I selfishly would rather he be alive with me than dead without me.

I try to be a mirror that reflects people's true selves back to them, but I refuse to see myself when the tables are turned.

I'm a sucker for MTV reality shows.

I read Anna Karenina when I was 8, yet I've never read The Chronicles of Narnia.

I can quote from Shakespeare and Spongebob with equal ease.

I can drink most everyone I know under the table, yet I've never had a hangover.

I'll feel utterly naked and exposed the minute I publish this post.

I can count the number of times I have felt truly happy on one hand.

I love to dance, but am usually to self-conscious to enjoy myself.

Only one person has ever made me think I might be likable underneath all my neuroses.

I am deeply spiritual, but not even remotely religious.

I am creative, but too self-critical to enjoy the finished products of my work.

I both fear and revel in my instability.

I am a walking contridiction.

I don't care what you think about this post (or me), but I secretly hope you'll tell me anyways.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

More Tasty Tidbits

Take the quiz:
What kind of eyes do you have? (with pictures)

Sunrise
You have sunrise eyes. Sunrise is the color of joy and elation. Your eyes symbolize your general sense of wellness. Your confidence and high self-esteem each and every day make you the person people want to be around. You are a very creative, passionate, and sexual person. You are not afraid to tell people what you think of them, whether good or bad. Some words to describe you: self-assuredness, out-going, busy, cheerful, bright, amiability, courage, successful, creative, personable, happiness, motivational, optimistic, strong, and aware.

Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!



You Should Be a Film Writer

You don't just create compelling stories, you see them as clearly as a movie in your mind.
You have a knack for details and dialogue. You can really make a character come to life.
Chances are, you enjoy creating all types of stories. The joy is in the storytelling.
And nothing would please you more than millions of people seeing your story on the big screen!

Monday, March 27, 2006

My Latest Obssession (Hemmorage - Chris Daughtry)



I resisted American Idol for the first 2 seasons. I tuned in the third season just to watch the auditions and hear Simon rip the daylights out of all the horrid singers. But I kept tuning in just to see how some of the people did. Season 4 I tuned in and voted every night. Season 5 I DVR every episode. I don't always get to vote because I'm usually asleep because I have to go to work. Chris (the hottie you are watching above :oP) totally has to win this season. If he doesn't win...I'll be on a plane to Los Angeles to burn down the American Idol offices! I am way digging on how awesome this guy is. I actually have most of the songs that he has sang on Idol downloaded onto my iPod, plus a couple songs from his band Absent Element, too. I can't believe how awesome he did with Hemmorage, which is one of my favorite songs ever. Not to mention...have you noticed how hot he is? Holy guacamole Batman! I just want to lick him! LOL Matt was rather amused by that one. Hey a girl can look, right? :oP

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Random Info Sunday

Your Quirk Factor: 57%

You're a pretty quirky person, but you're just normal enough to hide it.
Congratulations - you've fooled other people into thinking you're just like them!



You Are Jan Brady

Brainy and a little introverted, you tend to think life is a lot worse than it actually is.
And while you may think you're a little goofy looking, most people consider you to be a major babe.



You Are 36% Happy

You're not miserable, but you could stand to be a lot happier.
Focus on what's right in the world, and you'll be happier than you ever thought possible.



You Are A BCBG Black Leather Clutch

You're a modern, urban chick who's more than a little tough
(Well, as tough as you can be while carrying a purse)
Black leather is like your denim - goes good with everything
You'd even wear it to work, if you could get away with it

Friday, March 17, 2006

I Got $10 on That, T! (Hurt - Nine Inch Nails)







Nine Inch Nails - Hurt (Live)


Provided by VideoCodes4U.com


I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of shit
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stain of time
The feeling disappears
You are someone else
I am still right here

What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

Monday, March 13, 2006

The Lowdown...

So Saturday night was the awesomest EVER!! I having such a hard time putting it into words it was so good! Let's try, though...

So I meet up with Tyson about 7:30-ish on Saturday night at the Jackpot Casino. We share $5 worth of credits on the poker machine, where he spends his time giving me crap for trying to hit the inside straight or the flush (or frush as we call it :oP). Then we decided to go over to the Hoff Brau and grab a beer. We had fun there for a bit having this huge debate over happiness and it's relationship to money with another couple. Tyson & I were on the opposite end of the spectrum from Kevin & Jen, but it was all good. LOL We just agreed to disagree!

We started talking to this guy Tyson knows named C.B., and this crazy old guy kept freaking out that we were talking to C.B. It was crazy. Tyson kept telling him to just go sit down because he wasn't going to fight him. He wouldn't shut it up though, so we decided to just leave and check out somewhere else... Definitely a good call because I was way too close to knocking the old guy out! I couldn't believe it, though. This guy was literally like 70 years old! What in the heck was he thinking trying to start a fight with us? Tyson: 24, former football player & wrestler, compact/scrappy build. Me: 25, undefeated fight record, bad attitude. This guy wanted to take a swing at Tyson so bad. I flat out told him, "If you even try to hit my friend I will have you on the floor before you can connect."

So anyhoo, we left and went to the Crystal Bar to check out the action there. It was pretty busy, but boring. We were dancing to the Powerman 5000 and Marilyn Manson songs that were playing on the jukebox, and that's when it hit us. We NEEDED to go dancing! Tyson & I both love to dance (I actually call him my tiny dancer :oP), but we can never get anyone to go with us. LOL We figured we'd hit up Mixers, our new nightclub. It was pretty dead there, though, so we stayed for a beer and a couple dances then split. But we still had to find some real dancing! So we went to KO's Club because we heard that it was pretty bangin'. We found a spot on the dance floor and went to town! OMG Sooooo much fun. Tyson is a great dancer! Total blast to be with. At a couple points we actually had people around us stop their dancing to watch us go to town! The song on the ol' blog here is one of the ones we had an audience for. I don't think we spent more than a total of 5 minutes off of the dance floor. We ended up closing down the club!

The only sucky part of the night was when my car decided to die on Interstate 90 like a mile outside of town. Ugh! So we had to call Matt at 3am to come get us. He was not the most excited camper about that one, not that I blame him. We couldn't get it to start, so Tyson & I piled into the back of Matt's truck and we left the car on the side of the highway. We think it's a transmission issue, so we had it towed Sunday morning to the shop and are waiting to hear back on what the damage will be. Matt says if the repair cost is going to be too high, we'll just get a new car for me to drive - I'm holding out for a Lamborghini Diablo! LOL

Even with the car trouble at the end of the night, I still sit here and grin ear-to-ear like a big dork thinking about how much fun we had! We've already decided that we must do that again soon. Thank you, T, for the best night ever!

Oh My Goodness Gracious...Helllll Yeah!! (SOS - Rihanna)



Lalala lalala la la lala la Ohhh
You know I never felt like this before
Lalala lalala la la lala la Ohhh
Feels like something real

I'm obsessive when just one thought of you comes up
I'm aggressive just one thought of closing up

You got me stressing, incessantly pressing the issue
'Cause every moment gone you know I miss you
I'm the question and you're of course the answer
Just hold me close boy cause I'm your tiny dancer

You make me shaken, I'm never mistaken
But I can't control myself got me calling out for help

S.O.S. please someone help me.
It's not healthy for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard,
I can't take it see it don't feel right
S.O.S. please someone help me
It's not healthy for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard
You got me tossin' and turnin' and I can't sleep at night


This time please someone come and rescue me
Cause you on my mind is got me losing it
I'm lost, you got me lookin' for the rest of me
Love is testing me but still I'm losing it

This time please someone come and rescue me
Cause you on my mind is got me losing it
I'm lost you got me looking for the rest of me
Got the best of me, so now I'm losing it

Just your presence and I second guess my sanity
Yes its a lesson, it's unfair, you stole my vanity
Tummy's up in knots and when I see you I get so hot
My common sense is out the door can't seem to find a lot
Take me you know inside you feel it right
Take me I'ma put desire in your arms tonight
I'm out with you, ya got me head over heels
Boy you keep me hanging on the way you make me feel


S.O.S. please someone help me.
It's not healthy for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard,
You got me tossin' and turnin' and I can't sleep at night

This time please someone come and rescue me
Cause you on my mind is got me losing it
I'm lost, you got me lookin' for the rest of me
Love is testing me but still I'm losing it
This time please someone come and rescue me
Cause you on my mind is got me losing it
I'm lost you got me looking for the rest of me
Got the best of me, so now I'm losing it

Boy you know you got me feeling open
And boy your love's enough with words unspoken

I said boy I'm telling you, you got me open
I don't know what to do its true
I'm going crazy over you I'm begging

S.O.S. please someone help me.
It's not healthy for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard,
You got me tossin' and turnin' and I can't sleep at night

This time please someone come and rescue me
Cause you on my mind is got me losing it
I'm lost, you got me lookin' for the rest of me
Love is testing me but still I'm losing it
This time please someone come and rescue me
Cause you on my mind is got me losing it
I'm lost you got me looking for the rest of me
Got the best of me, so now I'm losing it

Lala lala lala lala Ohhh
Ohh ohh lala lala lala lala oh oh

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Thought For the Day

There are times in life where all you can really do is throw your hands in the air, scream "WTF???", and let fate take over from there because there isn't anything you CAN do. So why is is that this is the hardest thing for me to do? Why can't I just sit back and let fate run its course when I KNOW there is nothing else that can be done?

Friday, March 03, 2006

All sorts of self-discovery today LOL

Your Values Profile

Loyalty:

You value loyalty highly.
You're completely devoted to your friends and family.
Even if they totally screw up, you're still there for them.
Just make sure they're equally loyal to you!

Honesty:

You value honesty a fair amount.
You're honest when you can be, but you aren't a stickler for it.
If a little white lie will make a situation more comfortable, you'll go for it.
In the end, you mostly care about "situational integrity."

Generosity:

You value generosity highly.
So much so that you often put your own needs last.
There's nothing wrong with having a caring heart...
But you may want to rethink your "open wallet" policy.

Humility:

You value humility highly.
You have the self-confidence to be happy with who you are.
And you don't need to seek praise to make yourself feel better.
You're very modest, and you're keep the drama factor low.

Tolerance:

You value tolerance highly.
Not only do you enjoy the company of those very different from you...
You do all that you can to seek it out interesting and unique friends.
You think there are many truths in life, and you're open to many of them.

The Birth Test

OMG...I'd say that's me....

http://apersonalitytest.com/PTS/PTS-test04.asp?REF=404720


Birth Number: #3 THE LIFE OF THE PARTY

3's are idealists. They are very creative, social, charming, romantic, and easygoing. They start many things, but don't always see them through. They like others to be happy and go to great lengths to achieve it. They are very popular and idealistic. They should learn to see the world from a more realistic point of view.

Famous 3's Alan Alder, Ann Landers, Bill Cosby, Melanie Griffith, Salvador Dali, Jodi Foster.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Head Full of Memories (Hemmorage - Fuel)







Fuel - Hemorrhage (In My Hands)


Provided by VideoCodes4U.com



Memories are just where you laid them
Dragging the waters til the depths give up their dead
What did you expect to find?
Was it something you left behind?
Don't you remember anything I said when I said,


[Chorus:]
Don't fall away and leave me to myself
Don't fall away and leave love bleeding in my hands, in my hands again

And leave love bleeding in my hands, in my hands
Love lies bleeding

Oh hold me now I feel contagious
Am I the only place that you've left to go?
She cries her life is like
Some movie in black and white
Dead actors faking lines, over and over and over again she cries


[Chorus]

And I watched as you turned away
You don't remember, but I do

You never even tried

Don't fall away and leave me to myself
Don't fall away and leave love bleeding in my hands, in my hands again
Leave love bleeding in my hands, in my hands again
Leave love bleeding in my hands, in my hands again, oh